Friday, May 20, 2011

They say sure as God's hand and the tickin' of the clock

My grandmother knew her sin from her path to salvation.

My dad's mom was a Sunday School teacher for more than eight decades. She knew her Bible inside and out.

To her, sin was rampant, easy to see and not all that hard to avoid.

One day she said to me: "Alcohol has never touched these," pointing to her lips. Another time she lectured me for 10 minutes for wearing a Budweiser t-shirt.

Drinking alcohol was a sin, not going to church was a sin, not reading the Bible was a sin.

Her strict Methodist ways followed her for 98 years.

According to a vocal, well-funded group of believers, the Rapture is occurring in less than 24 hours, assuring that it will happen because "The Bible never lies."

My grandmother talked about The Book of Revelations once or twice. And if I remember my end times scripture correctly, and I do because I can quote the exact passage, Mark 13:32 says: "But of that day and that hour knows no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father.”

Orpha Cruise Van Buskirk Lockard would have scoffed at the Camping guy (in photo) who is leading this movement, calling him a false prophet.

To her, The Bible never lied.

Because, as anyone who's familiar with the Good Book knows, it's a sin to tell a lie.

Right, Mr. Camping?

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